“I looked in the mirror at work and realized I forgot to put makeup on,” a casual Facebook update that soon lit up my wall with likes and comments. I realized as each friend told me their funny story of forgetfulness, that I had also done nearly every one. My friends comments to my status update wrote this post.
Danielle said she ended up at work with one blue and one black shoe and Lisa wore two different flip-flops. Yeah, been there, done that. My wearing two different kinds of black shoes could be a fashion statement. At least I didn’t look down and realize I had forgotten to put shoes on, as a young sleepy friend did on his first day working for a bank.
Katie said she wore her shirt backwards and wondered why that tag was itching her neck all day. I too kept wondering why my new elastic waist cargo pants weren’t as comfortable as when I bought them. The light bulb finally went off when I went to put my hands in my pockets at the end of the day and finally realized they were on backwards. I really was ass backwards.
That reminds me of the time I slid on the same pair of slacks for church that I had worn the night before. As I walked down the isle that Sunday morning, I felt something slide down my leg and fall out onto the floor. It was my Saturday night panties.
In other goofy things we all do, Robin paid for gas and drove off without putting the gas into the car. I’ve paid for food at a fast food drive-through and got home and realized I’d forgotten the food and I’ve driven off with the vacuum tube cylinder from the bank drive-through. Marie’s story tops those; she filled up her car and drove off with the gas hose still attached. She wondered what that flapping sound was. She said the attendant didn’t find it funny when she returned the broken off gas hose and handle.
Lisa, Kim and Jaynie—I have also locked my keys in a running car. Yeah, I locked mine in my car at work. I was in the hospital cafeteria when they announced over the hospital-wide intercom, “Connie McLeod, please return to you car. The engine is still running.”
And Lisa, I don’t remember if I’ve tried to get out of the car with my seat belt on, but I have been unable to get into my home using the car unlock button. I don’t remember how many times I clicked that button while pointing it at the back door lock, I was too busy digging through my purse looking for my glasses that were on top on my head.
Olivia and Cheryl, I’ve shaved just one leg too. I’ve also gotten out of the shower with soaking wet hair and realized I’d forgotten to actually shampoo it.
Cheryl, I don’t have grandchildren yet, but like you I know I will be grateful when I see their smiling face from my rear view mirror all snug in their car seats and be so grateful that I didn’t leave them sitting in the parking lot or on the hood of the car.
I apparently have inherited my memory from my Mom. She was reminding me about getting a hamburger with the family at that new place Mad Cow. “No Mom,” I told her, “it’s called Fat Cow, not Mad Cow.”
Of course I had to Facebook that quote, to which my daughter commented that even after three years Nana can’t remember the name of the restaurant where she works, Coyote Blue (not Coyote Ugly). “Let’s go see Jade at Blue Crawfish,” she’ll say “or is it Red Coyote?”
My daughter can’t make too much fun of us. It wasn’t that long ago that I got the 2:00 AM phone call from her looking for a spare set of keys. She’d locked hers in the car and the engine was running. I told her to call Pop a Lock; I’d pay for it. I felt a little guilty realizing she’d inherited the gene.
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Adorable. Hysterical. And so true. Oh, and the panty thing…I can so see that happening. LOL. Thanks for the Sunday morning cheer.
Thanks Lisa! I could have added more things but I’ve forgotten what they were!
Reminds me of the day I wore my black pajama pants to a voiceover session. Probably no one would have noticed except I looked down mid-session and said, “Holy smoke, I’m wearing pajamas!”
Melinda,I had to read your comment out loud to Steve. We’re still laughing!
Loved it, Connie. A couple of weeks ago I forgot to put on the hand brake at Walmart and when I came out my car had backed into another car across the aisle. It took about 45 minutes for the owner to come out, even though they paged her, because she was getting her hair done. Walmart let me put my buggy in their freezer because I had 5 gallons of ice cream, which I had got at a bargain with a matching price ad. Way to save money, Jules!
Julie, you deserved to eat a gallon of ice cream after that!
Such a chuckle Connie, and I thought I was the only one! Life can be pretty funny when you we are the floor show. Great post!
Virginia, its our classic graceful quiet style that made us instant friends! LOL
Though it can be embarrassing at the time, I love these little happenings – they sure do keep us humble! I too have driven off after paying for fast food, without actually taking the food. And once (at work) I looked down to see a knee-high nylon stocking static-clinging to the leg of my pants. We are a silly species!
I’m so relieved to know I’m not the only one who’s gone thru a drive thru and forgotten the food!!
So you just took this to a whole new level: It’s Coyote Blues not Coyote Blue. So close, but appropriate in light of the topic.
BWAHAHAHAHA!!! Well…Bless My Heart!!!
Too funny and I can top that. I once forgot to put the brake on a bus full of boys when I filled up with gas. Imagine my mortification when one of my students jumped forward to stop the bus from rolling down the rode without the dumb driver.
Pat! That’s a story I’m very happy to say I can’t top! I bet those boys never let you forget it either.
Loved this! My worst one: couldn’t find my car keys to drive home from a family vacation. Grilled all the other drivers in the family, searched the vacation house high and low, left fuming, with my husband’s set of keys (we’d driven in two cars that year–another story). Swore one of the kids had lost them. Months later, put on my parka, felt something in the pocket…yep, my keys.
That is just like something I’d do!!!
So funny, Connie! Oh boy, can I relate. I must have done every one of these things at least once. At least I know it’s not just me.
Helene, you can rest assured that you are not alone.
I don’t know if it’s distraction or forgetfulness, but I think these things are pretty funny, too. My personal favorite is when I tried to look up my dentist’s number in the dictionary.
Susan, I can so relate to that!!!
I can relate to everything!
We are not alone!!
Too funny! And, as I’m laughing, I’m pulling out of my bag the keys I forgot to give back to my friend, whose apartment I stayed in while I was in New York. I’m now in Boston. Uh huh.
Oh no!!! A friend will understand.
Very funny. Better to laugh with than at, right? I went to work once without a bra on. I didn’t realize it until I was “bouncing” down the stairs.
We have to laugh at our bouncy selves!
I love your blog, Connie!
Thanks John! You’ve made my day!